“Spirituality is great for the AA Program but it might hinder my enjoyment and ability to carry on my everyday life.” “Do you expect me to think about Spirituality all day long?” “Thinking about Spirituality takes the fun out of everything.” These and more, similar thoughts were front and center of my mind when I came into the program. I had no background in this type of thinking, either religious or spiritual. I really didn’t know how to act or live around it. And besides, whenever something stressful comes into my life, how can an invisible power possibly help me?
I decided to go with the flow and ideas given to me by my sponsors who said “Fake it till you make it.” I had known these people before they stopped drinking. They were very similar to me in our days. They were a hard drinking, hard fighting, hard screwing bunch. I had fought with some of them “In the day” while pulling them out of bars and alleys in Detroit and was amazed and impressed by their lives now. They were genuinely Happy, Joyous, and Free and I was the exact opposite. I was miserable, sad, and imprisoned by my alcoholism.
Next came realizing that there was a Higher Power of some kind “out there” because something had to get all of this created and then keep it going. Something had to be changing the seasons. Something had to be allowing me to breathe and think. I then started to think that there is probably a Higher Power responsible for all of this and more. I have a pulse without even thinking about it. I was breathing in and out without thought. Also, something was completely changing these people I was coming across in meetings. They had been miserable just like me. Now, they were happy individuals.
I heard that if I were ready to go to any lengths to get it, I would. So, I “faked it” and very soon I made it. I then looked into Step 3 and said, “OK, it is starting to show me that it works so why not?” and I turned it over. I heard that Step 1 is “I can’t.” Step 2 is “He can,” and Step 3 is “I think I’ll let Him.” Almost immediately the relief came. We are only as sick as our secrets and this was the first step in bringing my secrets into the daylight. Carrying the load was not so heavy any more because I was being assisted with the load by my Higher Power who was working through the others in the meetings.
I have an addictive personality so I wanted more, much more. So I continued talking with my Higher Power and asking for help. I never thought of asking for help with anything before because I thought that it would make me look weak. As soon as I admitted that I wasn’t strong enough by myself, I became stronger. How and why? I don’t even care because it worked and still does.
Do you want to be Happy, Joyous, and Free? I can’t and won’t even try to tell you how to do it, but this worked for me. If you want to copy it or take it, go right ahead. This program is just like love – I can’t keep it unless I give it away.
Don’t be afraid of living. Be happy with the fact that you can now truly live and enjoy life. If you didn’t drink or drug today, you now have choices, maybe for the first time. Do you choose to be miserable or do you choose to be Happy, Joyous, and Free? The choice is yours and nobody else’s. Choose wisely!
NEW We now have blogs and a podcast, in addition to our Facebook page, that are updated daily. We hope that you will use these sites and comment so that we can share with each other our experiences, strengths, and hopes. To locate the blogs and Facebook pages, simply search @Spiritualityandrecovery. For the podcast, search Spotify.com for Spiritualityandrecovery. On iPhone say “Hey Siri, Play the podcast Spiritualityandrecovery”