If you were anything like me, with everything that I did when in the madness, there was alcohol involved somehow. I was either drinking, coming off a drunk, planning my next drink, or wishing that I could never drink again, even telling God “Get me out of this and I will never do it again.” Of course, this was followed by my drinking again and doing the very same that I had said I would never do again. I couldn’t ride my motorcycle without drinking, even buying a tubular quiver-type cooler that held 6 beer cans and wore it across my back when riding and attending sports and entertainment events, many times with my kids.
Before I bought the bike, I had sworn that I was never going to have a motorcycle, then it changed to if I ever get one, I will not drink alcohol before riding because they scared me. As soon as I bought one, because of the gas shortage at that time of course and that would save me money, I never drove it without drinking. Golf? Cans or bottles of alcohol in the bag. Dancing? Can only do it in bars, of course. Attending sports events? They always served beer. You get the picture.
Does that mean that I will never do these things again if I don’t drink alcohol? Absolutely not! The program is full of people who you know or will meet that do these things on a regular basis without alcohol. In addition to the above, there are card games, dances, bike riders, fishermen, travelers, hikers, campers, you name it. There is someone in the program that does it and is looking for someone else to do it with. You can not only do what you want, but you will remember it the next day. You will not feel guilty because you were not sure what you did the night before, and the list is endless. So, bottom line, if you have something you want to do, as long as your conscience approves, JUST DO IT!!! It will absolutely leave you blessed not stressed.
Christina, your earlier thoughts about how will you ever have fun again have been echoed by most, if not all, of us. This has been a topic of much discussion that I have heard since I came into the Program. This is also what keeps some, who are not sick and tired enough of the misery and agony, in the madness. Since they never left the madness, they really have no choice in the matter. You, on the other hand, now have choices. Why, you may ask? Because, if you didn’t drink or drug today, you are now able to choose anything that you want. I know you are feeling better by now but please remember that it only gets better from now on, as long as you choose to not drink or drug and continue going to meetings.
Yes, I keep reminding myself, “One day at a time!” I certainly don’t want to get lax and slide back into old habits. I feel too at peace and I don’t ever want to go back to the chaos. I like having fun!!! 😊
The beauty of this all is that it just continues getting better. If you continue working your program to the best of your ability 24/7/365, it will surely keep getting better. If it still does for me, and it does, it will for you, too. That is a promise!
I struggled with this a lot before I made the commitment to get sober. I thought I’d be boring or no fun. I finally realized that when I was drinking that’s all I did, I wasn’t having fun because I wasn’t really participating in the activity that I was there for, I was just drinking. I know now that I have a lot more fun, and remember everything, now that I’m sober. I don’t ever want to go back!